f October 2010 ~ BeautifulSmile♥

I am perfectly made, and wonderfully flawed. Hi

Saturday, October 30, 2010

nak balik rumaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

tak tau kenapa tibatiba rindu gile kat rumah.
haritu semangat je nak study kat melaka, taknak balik sume.
this time,
entahla. saya tak tau kenape.

cepatlah 3hb.
i want home.

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Friday, October 29, 2010

one killing paper is over, LETS BLOG! :D

enough talking about my killing paper,
feeling so free, i could even online at nearly 3am.
*evil laugh*

where to start, huh?
lets start about me missing my FRIENDS.
oh, rakanrakanku yang sangat saya rindukan.
should talk about that to them :D :D
merindui zaman sekolah.
where everything is just there, what left was just for us to sit and listen.
 i miss going gaga with my class monitor and together disturb the whole class.
when we were in school, never thought that we going to miss school this much, dont you think?

well, whatthehell.
life gotta move on. :)
we grow up, we will eventually leave the happy moments behind and pursuit for the others to come.
talking about friends again...
well, ofcourse, i have friends that is pretty much not in a good condition.
i have friends that struggle in their studies.
struggle in family problems
and struggle in relationships.
well, that is what we call life.
its just now we are more mature to look at life differently.
we tend to care more.
we pay more attention.
sometimes, i do afraid to give them some advises.
or just to find some words that perhaps makes them look at things in a different way.
because i know i am not in their shoes.
without knowing that i totally understand the feelings of being-in-their-shoes.

i have stuff that would bring me down too.
i have ALOT of reasons to be sad.
ofcourse, again, everyone does.
but i choose to be happy
because, yes,  i have so many reasons to be happy too.

as i turn older.
i got very good in HIDING.
sometime i feel like flying.
sometimes i feel like jumping off the clift
sometimes i feel like shouting for the whole world to hear.
sometimes i feel like dancing in the rain.
nobody can even guess.

so, DO NOT straight away jumps into conclusion, when its about me.
i am a little peculiar.
maybe because i like to think a lot and hide my thoughts.
and maybe,
it takes you a tremendously long time,
to really understands me.

becareful with your thoughts.
it most probably not true.
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Wednesday, October 27, 2010

oh, awak. awak jatuh cinta la dengan saya ^^

saya perlukan awak berkasihsayang dengan sayaa.
have crush la on me,
find me a little attractive, maybe?
be a little considerate, and make this whole thing easy for me eh?

boleh eh, EN. FINALS?
iloveyou, btw. be nice to me, eh?
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Monday, October 25, 2010

when you getting tired ...

susah rupanya nak jadi seseorang yang terlalu mengambil berat.
one took me as a busybody.
and another...
just so frustrating.

there was a  lot of times before,
when i SERIOUSLY regret when i worried too much about you.
i regret just too many things when it comes to you.
but i dont know why i just couldn't stop.
i just couldn't.
i just have to do all i might to make things fall in place again.
well, yes.
it is like the natural feeling of me.
something i was born with.

i do get tired of it.
tired of wanting things to be like before.
tired of want to be with someone i once know.
tired of wanting you to feel much better.

you know what.
maybe it is true that i have to stop to care too much.
maybe is true that you dont need me.
i should stop.

yes, of course.
when you have a friend.
that sounds like he/she is facing THE END OF THE WORLD,
i could just LISTEN.
without having anything to say to make him feel better.
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Sunday, October 24, 2010

what is the best things about RAINBOWS?

not the colour.
not very much of the beauty.
its the RAIN.
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Saturday, October 23, 2010


this is my BLOODY blog
what i wanna blog about is my BLOODY wish.
if you dont like what i BLOODY post in my BLOODY blog,
go ahead and write it on YOUR BLOODY BLOG, then.
and BLOODY stop reading MINE!
its not that i talk bad about you
its not that i talk bad about my family.
its not that i talk about something that is not true.
you dont like what i blog about, 
stop reading it.

even i am stupid.
so, what the eff?
just be grateful that i dont mention she is a BIATCH or anything like that.

tak payah nak point out of my mistake sangat la kaan.
i post this thing on my blog pun, people wont know who the hell i am talking about.
and i dont have HUNDREDS FOLLOWERS that would be reading this thing.
and i never did talk bad about you.

you think i'm a whinner, love to complain about things, about you.
just look yourself in the mirror, honey.
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Wednesday, October 20, 2010

we never satisfied, do we?

of course.
it is like the natural feeling of the humanity.
always wanted more.
and more.
and more.
and tend to forget to appreciate what you owned.
well, of course as one perfectly NORMAL human being, i too, feel the same sometimes.
not talking about anyone else.
the desire of wanting more is just way beyond the capability to fulfil it.
even though the ability to dream is something so beautiful but we do know the limits, dont we?
aren't you get tired of wanting more?
dont a PERFECTION scares you?
it does scares me sometimes.

i learn to appreciate what i have.
i learn to be satisfied with whatever life offers me.
i learn to live a life that pretty much look like a normal life but nobody knows, perhaps, sooner or later it offers me something beyond the expectations.


i dont know whattheshit im mumbling about.
got to go back studying.

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Tuesday, October 19, 2010


not so sure what to talk about today.
right now.
suppose to be studying.
but i gues it wont hurt if i take a break.
suppose to be out dinner with him. but. hehe. sorry eh awak. saya kemalasan. :P
so here i am besides facebook-ing. :D

its studying week 
sedih kan?

i didn't go back home because i am certain i'd be doing something else rather than studying.
so yea, i choose to stay.
even ma and abah din know that its studying week and i have no class.
if not, they surely have been dragging me back home for now.
 takpe, dah jumpa ma and abah last saturday.

anyways, for you.
i dah malas nak bagi you katekate semangat dah.
sebab i tau ramai orang dah bagi.
and i know you sort of getting tired of hearing it.
sorry that i have to ask you whether you are ok or not when you are 
sorry for that too.
and i wont stop you from being sad or whatever shit you wanna do.
i have said what i wanna said and i know you are one smart guy and you know what best for yourself.
just live your life to the fullest.
you know you can always count on me.

well as if for me.
i think i really need 
on the face.
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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Pursuit My Happiness

i dont wanna lie.
i do have stuff that bring me to a point where i could even drop my tears.
well, whatthehell, everyone does.
but i guess its time for me to stop dragging my sadness, dont you think?
it is my bloody turn to be happy.
so, please.
i do love you but your sarcastic words are just way too much.
well just, maybe, JUST MAYBE, you are just as stupid as her.
whatever it is, of course, i still love you.
but since you asked for it, okay, i will never get involve in your bloody-shit-emo problems anymore that seems to be ENDLESS.

talking about MY life.
i am currently studying in UiTM Alor Gajah Melaka, which is for me, A GREAT PLACE.
i still have my ke-AWESOME-ted friends that i can always rely on,
special thanks to 
Ainur Syahira
Bernice Sew
 Christine John
Khairi Abdullah
sayang kamu semua.
i have great roommates and cool classmates.
i have a lot of wonderful people that love to smile around here in Lendu.
i have that extremely cute cat and kittens at my hostel that i dont mind sharing my food with :)
i have great lecturers that mostly dont mind sharing stories about life.
i had great time here in Lendu even when i spend it with sleeping or walking down the empty lane.
i have such wonderful person in my life that loves me with all his heart.

thanks for helping me putting the broken pieces together.
thanks for being a part of my life. 
thanks for giving me such love.

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Sunday, October 10, 2010

NewChapter :)

its tenoctobertwozeroonezero.
and the sun sets beautifully today.

dear you,
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Thursday, October 7, 2010


it is DEFINITELY not easy being SITI SUHAIDA SULAIMAN (pretty name, yes?)
*eyri, saya curi ayat awak!*
i am not the "anak manja" that always have what she wanted.
i am not from the super loaded family that again, have all her wishes granted.
i am not a person with an excellent brain that all the assignments is just like a piece of cake for her.
i am not one perfect person that i cannot commit any mistakes at all.
i am not somesone so good-hearted until i cannot get angry at all.
i am not so feeling-less person until i dont understand the feeling of getting hurted and sorrow.

i am too, a normal person.
still need chocolates when im unhappy,
still sweats when im nervous,
still hug my huge teddy when im asleep,
still wishing that life is still like when we was still young when the hardest desicion to make was; "which colour of crayon should i choose next?"

i might not be the same girl you know past few years.
i might not be that girl of your dream.
i might not be that kind-hearted person.
i might not be that pretty girl across the street that you willing to get-hit-with-a-car for.
but this is just me,
a girl named suhaida that have such wonderful friends and surrounded with amazing people.
a girl that live an average life with a happy family and great companies.
a girl that have crushed on some good-looking dudes and ...
a girl that might be falling for you. :)

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Monday, October 4, 2010

new favourite :)

The strands in your eyes that color them wonderful
Stop me and steal my breath.
And emeralds from mountains thrust toward the sky
Never revealing their depth.
Tell me that we belong together,
Dress it up with the trappings of love.
I'll be captivated,
I'll hang from your lips,
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above.
I'll be your crying shoulder,
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older,
I'll be the greatest fan of your life.
And rain falls angry on the tin roof
As we lie awake in my bed.
You're my survival, you're my living proof.
My love is alive -- not dead.
Tell me that we belong together.
Dress it up with the trappings of love.
I'll be captivated,
I'll hang from your lips,
Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above.
I'll be your crying shoulder,
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older,
I'll be the greatest fan of your life.
And I've dropped out, I've burned up, I've fought my way back from the dead.
I've tuned in, turned on, remembered the things that you said
I'll be your crying shoulder,I'll be your crying shoulder,
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older,
I'll be the greatest fan of your life.
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older,
I'll be the greatest fan of your...
I'll be your crying shoulder,
I'll be love's suicide
I'll be better when I'm older,
I'll be the greatest fan of your life.
The greatest fan of your life.
...greatest fan of your life.


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Sunday, October 3, 2010

hey there, beautiful people...

how are you today?
not a good start of a day?
just a normal day?
a spectacular day?
whatever it is, just be glad that you are still alive.

i had this "semangatjahat" got on me these few days.
you know, all the moody thingy.
nak marah je everyone.
and and
being happy when my frens are not also sort of make me feel like a total jerk.

minta maaf eh.
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Friday, October 1, 2010

"is that Su?"

"jangan kutuk orang kat blog, su, tak manis..."

buat ape la nak jadi manis kat blog kan?
haish. lawak la..
well, you dont know what i been through.
you dont know about her.
so, just gimme some space to let out my anger, ayte?
muchas gracias ^^

so yes, i have this moodswing gets on me quite oftenly this time.
especially at night.
macam tak boleh nak cakap dengan sapesape lansung la kan.
keje asyik nak marah jee.
memang moody macam makcik.
lepas tu, bangun tengahtengah malam and makan.
macam mane tak gemuk.

assignments makin banyak sejak akhirakhir ni.
memang tak dapat le nak berfikir terlampau panjang ketika menulis blog.
but then, i have some friends that have been talking to me.
expressing their feelings, some is annoyed, some is missing someone, and some is just not so in a good situation.
dear friends,
i believe in karma.
and believe me, it does do us good.
so, if you think you're down,
just think forward, they maybe will feel the same way you felt now,
the maybe will find themselves hurt as you are right now.
think backward.
maybe YOU have hurt someone before
and it is time for you to feel the same way what you have make them feel before.
its a similar feeling.
it is just how you get through it that makes is different.
sabar je laa.
and believe in karma.
sesungguhnya, what comes around goes around.

and i am happy.

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